Constant Battle

55434 68410 66506 32821 51640

Just another zip code. Just another state line.

It’s finally come to that hasn’t it? Living out of boxes and suitcases, no place to call home, everywhere is only temporary. From the girl who’s theme in life is running away, what does that tell you about how I really feel? I don’t know if it’s the fact that it’s just another state, or the fact that it’s never some place I can call home. They’re packing and leaving, with no reason to regret, no reason to look back... They didn’t build roots. I on the other hand, have relationships, regrets, and reason to look back and wonder what could’ve been. They won’t return, they have no reason to, but will I? I’ve mastered having little attachment to places, but I’ve yet to successfully unattached myself from people. No goodbyes, and little warning. Just loading up the moving van, again and they’re off without me, and that is a swift knock off my feet to remind me, I’m on my own... I’ve grown up, and there’s no turning back.

So to those cold truths I admit I won’t claim another zip co

de. I don’t want another state. I don’t need another place to run to. Home to me isn’t where I am from, it's not where I’ve been, it's not where I’m going, and it's not where I am at. Home to me is a feeling of comfort that only comes from being with the people I love. I won’t label it with an address. It doesn’t matter where my boxes gather dust, where my toothbrush lay, or which state I am forced to pay taxes to.. Which just comes back to the old cliché, home is truly where the heart’s at. Ultimately though, let's be honest all of our "homes" are only temporary, so in fact I'm not alone. Our eternal home is waiting... and when you live in the light of eternity all your values change.

Accepted!

I am officially accepted into the Disney College Program for the Spring of 2011!

Let support raising kick into gear!

Hope you all are having a magical semester :) be expecting a letter detailing more about my ministry soon!

It's not enough just to say that we're okay

My title is lyrics from a song called Any Other Way, By Tenth Avenue North ... My FAVORITE BAND. Their music really brings me to a place where I realize how desperately I need my God. Anyway, that's the song I'm listening to right now, thought I'd share.

It's the start of a new week, PRAISE GOD. Last week was draining. I had to apply for the Disney College program, and go through many interview processes. No worries though, I already am employed by Disney, just formality.

October has taken over and the weather has taken a drastic change, along with my heart. I'm sure I will go back and forth with my excitement to return to Florida, but I don't regret my decision. Some days it might not be what I want to do, but I know God has chosen this path for me. Prayer for my heart over the next months would be great. I also know prayer for the people around me as I go in and out of wanting to take this step of faith would be nice. I can only imagine it would be hard for them not to encourage me to stay after I tell them I'm having second thoughts, or to get frustrated when one day I'm nonchalant about it, and the next day I'm scared we won't stay in touch. These next 3 months will be faith building, for myself, my family, and my close friends. Trusting in the Lord to lead me wherever He wants me to go, to financially take care of me, and to protect my relationships has already proven to be difficult. I realize it's all just part of God's perfect plan for my life.

Another big prayer request would be that I don' t get caught up in what's ahead and miss out on what's here and now. My grades have already suffered, along with my friendships. Support raising is underway and can be very distracting. God has me here at K-State this semester, and I know he wants me to be glorifying Him here on this campus, not waiting until I get somewhere else. My life is my mission... today my life is in Manhattan.

EMAW!